Someone posted a message about the pain of being rejected in LinkedIn today. Then, I spend my whole day on thinking about various phases of rejection and the happiness in embracing the reality. Yes, like every Homo sapiens, I also have a kitty full of rejection letters from many people. Many people rejected and there are many people whom I rejected and blocked from my life.
Yes, I am madly busy these days as I am in a new project at my office and I have to finish my work before Oct 20. My boss told me that he wont allow me to go to my astrology class on Oct 26, if I dont finish my work before Oct 20th. Still, I thought I would write a blog since that post inspired me a lot .
I get so many mails of people who was terminated from their jobs, who were estranged by their spouses………….yes, its hard to go through such pains, but there is not a single human being who was never ever rejected. I have read the story of KFC owner Colonel Sanders was rejected 1009 times.
Yes, rejections are very scary, but we all are destined to go through it at some point in time. We can get rejected by our parents, spouse, lover, children, friends, colleagues, office, company, neighbours, and relatives and there are people who rejected by their own nation eg Snowden. He had to flee from his home country to Russia. We are destined to some kind of rejection, so no one can escape from that.
Some people use others and throw away, well, such people also will go through rejections and fears, but we may not know all of their stories. They also will pay for their atrocities that are for sure.
Now we all are already rejected and many rejections and more to come, don’t sit and gnash, but let’s see how to overcome the pain of rejection.
Many counsellors say, forgive, forget and advance. Well, it is not easy to forgive a person who hurt us. You should think that you are not alone here with such bruises. So many people around the world who live with such traumas. I was watching a video about Qandeel Baloch, the social media queen who was murdered by her brother. We all know her story and she is from Pakistan. In that video, Pakistan, female activist are sharing how Pakistan government was forced to strengthen the laws for the protection of the females and how Qandeel Baloch’s murder acted as a catalyst. In that video, you can listen to so many women who were raped and thrown away, how they survive in life.
I hope you all know Muqtar Mai, who was gang raped. Before that, her 12-year-old brother was raped by a group of men and when the boy filed a case against the rapists, the rapists imprisoned him and claimed that 12 year old was having an adulterous relationship with a 20-year-old female. Rapists were sentenced to 5 years. Mean time, the village council wanted to punish 12-year-old boy for adultery. In order to defend her brother, Muktar Mai came in front of the council and she was gang raped by 4, in the presence of 10 men. Phew…….. I donno what justice is that. Similar cases are there in India and all around the world. Raping women as a punishment.
Now let’s see Muktar Mai’s plight as a person whose fate was so doomed. She is a woman of courage. She didn’t get the justice which she deserved from the court of MEN. Well, justice for ladies is now also a distant dream for a woman in India too. In my state, there are so many cases whose culprits easily escaped. Yes, there are few cases where some women got justice.
This woman started an organization “Women’s Welfare Organization “to educate women, and she gives hope to so many such ladies. She won many international acclaims. She is a hope and strength for those, who feel lost and rejected. God used her powerfully, but as always, she is under a lot of restrictions.
When we look at religious texts of all religion, we can a number of people who were used and rejected. When I feel rejected I look into 2 people’s life. 1) Devi Sita and Jesus Christ.
During my childhood, I used to hate Lord Ram for deserting Devi Sita. It had to happen, so happened. As a righteous king, he should have found some way to guard his wife. We donno what was exactly his helplessness. I thought in so many angles. He could have sent Sita to a distant place with full protection. I feel so bad for the pain which Devi Sita was called for. She was destined to go through that, and she could not overcome that pain and shame. She was queen, who supported her husband with fullest of her heart. She did not leave him during the time of his troubles….. still……
Jesus told Peter, who was promising that he would never ever leave Jesus
“Truly I tell you,” Jesus answered, “this very night before the rooster crows, you will disown me three times.”
As Jesus predicted, Peter disowned him. So many people were benefitted through Jesus, but very less people were with him, that too indirectly to be with him in his sufferings. He was destined to go through that. He didn’t do any miracles to escape from his struggles. He knew that he was going to suffer, that was his destiny and he went through that. He asked God,” WHY YOU FORSAKE ME”. God wanted him to go through such horrible pain even though Jesus was divine. Since he went through struggles and pains, we can look at him and gain strength. He wasn’t a sinner, but we are mere sinners who are lost in the MohMaya.
Very truly I tell you, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds.
Pains and rejections should work as a catalyst in our life. Sometimes these pains will come to us as a part of our own Karma. Sometimes we are innocent. We are here on earth like kernels, someone went through pains and rejections and that became a reason for us to grow.
During our company’s new app launch our Director was sharing how he went through struggles in the initial days when our company was just a start up in 1994. Now, his pains, struggles and fears are not there, because he was a fighter.
I lost my job twice, even after achieving my target, one employer terminated me (with many others) blaming that I didn’t achieve the target. I still have to get around at least 50000 rs as my remuneration. I did not complain. That guy has stored plenty of bad Karma and he is in the midst of trouble now. The universe will repay him. I don’t want anyone’s money.
As a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, and then resurrect as a plant, we also should learn to resurrect. When we resurrect from the pains and rejections, we will set an example for those weak souls who live in the pain of rejection. The Kernel never dies; it is paving way for new comers, freshness, goodness and nourishment. Like the woman in Pakistan. She is spreading the light for so many.
Yes, coming out from such pain will take a lot of effort. You may fall into depression at times, but life belongs to those who are ready to fight for the survival. Not for cowards.
You should not over depend on another human being to get out from the pain of rejection. Yes, you can approach a counsellor, but remember even if he/she is studied counselling from the top university in the world, she/he is not perfect. Learn to pray, prayer is not going to temple, church or synagogue and spending time looking at the statue. People don’t understand this. When I counsel people I ask them “Do you pray” then they say “I worship, Sun, recite mantras, do morning pooja, go to holy mass……..yes, there is nothing wrong in following your faith. But prayer is communicating to the divine. A direct communication with the lord is the best medicine for mental health. Whenever I feel that I am rejected, I go to a hospital or charity work and feel how much blessed am I until now and I have nothing to complain about anything in my life. If you are in pain for a long time, that shows you are a selfish person. You are obsessed with yourself and you like that Victim mode. You are showing that you are a cheap attention seeker. Ultimately you are degenerating yourself and doing injustice to yourself.
First of all, we are here on earth for a short term and God has sent us in an internship. We have to perform well during this internship so that we can work with him in his Head Quarters, directly under him. On earth, we are tested for our faith and dedication towards God not towards another mortal being. So, no matter, whatever happens, we are responsible to prove our faithfulness and gratitude so that we can finish this internship and for a permanent position.
Other than Lord, everything is mortal……….
Everything in the world is momentary guys. Relationship with parents, children, spouse, job and whatever we see in the world is just temporary. Please don’t get lost in this MohMaya. Always fix your eyes in a higher vision and mission, then you will understand even though the entire world rejects you, almighty is ready to accept you and inviting you for the eternal happiness.
Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you!
Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.”
Isaiah 42:16 I will lead the blind by ways they have not known, along unfamiliar paths I will guide them; I will turn the darkness into light before them and make the rough places smooth. These are the things I will do; I will not forsake them.
Rejection from another human being is not terrible than the rejection from the Lord. When the lord rejects you……..then nothing can save you.